BARTZ: Liberal arts majors should embrace unemployment

Liberal arts majors are deluding themselves. Or at least, that's what society would have you believe.

Having a major in English or philosophy often results in either scoffing or "So what are you going to do with that?" I usually hesitate to state my major unless asked. Majoring in film studies, for most people, is like majoring in cat petting. Cute and entertaining, but immature past age six. For some reason, people believe that only bankable majors will get a good job. The joke's on the naysayers: Liberal arts majors don't actually want a job at all.

But why would anyone want to be unemployed? Actually, there are many benefits to unemployment for the liberal arts major.

1. Woe equals artistic gold. As I've written previously, a sob story is the best way to people's hearts. Job opportunities for majors in studio art or film production are far from secure. A number of interesting events could result, including unemployment, homelessness or just simple woe. But the acquirement of such harrowing experiences can be turned into a tragic movie or painting. There's still no guarantee people will pay attention, but at least you'll have good art, right?

2. Even if there is no money to be made from art now, people might think it's brilliant when you die. It could even make millions, like Vincent Van Gogh, or become a standard in academia, like Sylvia Plath. Obviously, you wouldn't be able to enjoy it, but you could leave a legacy and money behind for your family. Or for a money-grubbing businessman. Either way, the legacy is what counts.

3. Being unemployed would leave all the free time in the world, which would allow time to perfect your craft. Eventually you'd become a true expert at your field. Such dedication might not pay the rent, but at least your extensive knowledge of comparative literature or Thelonius Monk would dazzle people.

4. You'll never be accused of being a sell-out. The whole point of selling out is to make a fair penny off of your work. This problem is guaranteed to be solved by unemployment. People always accuse their favorite actor or band of selling-out when they do more commercial work or become popular. Somehow, that shows they aren't serious about their craft. Being unemployed is synonymous with dedication to art. Furthermore, instead of having a horde of fair-weather fans, you'd have a few devoted ones. It's all about quality over quantity.

5. If people know that you're willingly unemployed, they'll definitely think you're crazy. For an artist, insanity is almost a requirement, and usually insanity helps with the actual creative process. Why would it be important to be crazy? Like almost everything else in life, appearances are important. If you aren't monetarily successful as an artist, then at least you can have the appearance of success. Everyone knows that artists are supposed to be crazy, and unemployment would be a logical result. You could probably get away with so much because you're that crazy artist. Think of the possibilities!

6. Unemployment could lead you to live at your parents' house. I know that sounds like a terrible idea, but hear me out. Nice, loving parents probably want to support you. You could avoid real responsibility for that much longer, until they eventually get tired of it. Even if your parents aren't nice, or you don't like them, they would probably at least feel obligated to help out. Sapping them of their funds would be a fitting revenge. Artists are all about sticking it to the man.

7. Pure laziness. Clearly, artists don't have the energy to get a real job. Unemployment is preferable to making a real effort. Plus, how else is an artist supposed to get 12 hours of sleep a night?

Basically, people shouldn't judge those who are in the arts because there's nothing to judge. Unemployment is the best way to go to achieve good art. In fact, employment in general is overrated. The employed don't know real pain. If you can't enjoy suffering, then what's the point of living? Anyone who doesn't agree just doesn't get it.

For those of you who do, take pride. You have better things to do than make money.

Erica Bartz is a senior film studies major. Reach her at ericabartz@dailynebraskan.com