Finding love is a common experience in college. While many relationships fizzle out, some are meant to last. But with an unplanned, open future, the hassle of marriage and all of the stresses that come with college, tying the knot is best left for after graduation.
Many college couples face the decision of when they should get married, if ever. But rushing into it during college can complicate one’s university experience as well as create many obstacles down the line.
One of the reasons college is not the ideal time to get hitched is because of the openness of the future. It is impossible to know of the opportunities that may come in life, and college especially is a time to be focusing on personal goals. Rushing into marriage could limit the scope of some of those opportunities.
College is a time of individual exploration and a transition into adulthood for most people. This is the time when careers are decided, passions are discovered and identities are formed. Adding marriage into the mix means immediately tying one’s future to another person’s, and thus giving up some of that personal freedom that could’ve been used to find oneself.
Another reason to wait until after college for marriage is the threat of divorce, which is financially and emotionally taxing. While statistics vary, the American Psychological Association reports fifty percent of marriages in the U.S. end in either divorce or separation. College students often face many changes upon graduation such as new locations, schedules and priorities. Waiting to ensure a relationship will last through these obstacles can help reduce the chances of having to go through a messy divorce.
Divorce is only one example of possible marital stress. There are also money problems, daily obstacles, balancing busy schedules and much more that can lead to tension in both partners of a marriage.
Marriage may only add to the stresses that already come with the college experience such as academic pressure, changing living situations, adapting to new experiences and new jobs. With all of this already on the table, adding all of the difficulties that come with marriage can be overwhelming.
Some may say marriage in college is worth it because it gives students someone to rely on throughout college. Reliance and a long-term relationship is possible in college, and for some people it’s definitely the right choice.
It’s possible to have this type of support without limiting opportunities through marriage. Many couples live happily their whole lives without rushing into marriage in school. The possibility of missed opportunities, the very common threat of divorce and added academic stress make it not worth the hassle.
If people are really meant for each other and plan to be together for the rest of their lives, why rush into marriage in college? Marriage is better off reserved for after graduation, when things are more definite and the rest of one’s life begins.
This piece was originally published in the February 2019 edition of The DN.